Can’t Express How Much I Love Clemson Players Putting Their Fingers In Opponents’ Crevices

Pause.

Double pause.

Okay we’re good. If you haven’t caught this fake controversy made up by bloggers with too much time, a Clemson player got caught shoving his fingers up dude’s butt in the Ohio State game. Here’s the tape:

And full transparency, that wasn’t the only time:

Clemson’s Ben Boulware played it off as nothing more than a joke. Something they do to mess with the other team.

I truly can’t express enough how much I love this move. It’s the perfect way to get in the head of the opposing team. Not to make this about myself, but my go to move as a high school football player was pinching guys nipples as I blocked them. All about getting their mind off something other than the play. Walter Payton used to tie guys’ shoes together. I’d be stunned if there weren’t guys rubbing folks down at the bottom of the pile just to get in their head.

Once you start grabbing grundle, you’ve completely thrown the other team off of their game. Doesn’t every team want to be unpredictable? Everything you prepare for pre-game, you just don’t prepare for that. Now instead of their blocking assignment or whatever, they’re wondering how they can protect their butthole. Check. Mate. Mental game’s so important in football, I’d implement this as a cornerstone of my game plan if I were a coach. I mean, Clemson’s 1-0 in games they get caught giving on field prostate exams, sooooooo

*full transparency, #42 went a bit far with it, like my mans was knuckle deep*

 

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