Things I Thought Would Be More Important: Continents

Whoever created the idea of continents was one shifty individual.

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But let’s talk about them. Continents, to me, were immediately discredited once it hit me that we’re counting Australia as a continent. Not the moment I learned it (1st grade?), but when it hit me that that tiny ass country in the middle of the ocean gets to be a continent based off of…??? BAFFLING.

Beyond that, continents add nothing to the world. Would you care if everything East of America was renamed Europe? All of Asia and Africa? Or what if I just renamed South America bumblegoo? Nope, because the continents are yet another made up narrative pushed by society to pettyfog our minds. I’ve spent at least 50 hours in my life talking about continents, or even saying the word continent. I could have learned Chinese in that time, or maybe grown 6 more inches (50 hours of stretching I’d have grown a few more inches, shut up). More than anything, I guess, I just want to know the criteria for becoming a continent. #RIPPangea to be honest.

Join the conversation, let me know something you thought was important as a kid that isn’t important at all now at tips@crossoverreport.com, or on Twitter @crossoverreport.

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